The Santa Claus is Lactose Intolerant Card
The Santa Claus is Lactose Intolerant Card
The Santa Claus is Lactose Intolerant Card
Greeting Cards for Assholes

The Santa Claus is Lactose Intolerant Card

Regular price $4.00 $0.00 Unit price per

People are always leaving milk and cookies out for Santa Claus, and carrots for the reindeer... but let's be honest here, Santa could use a carrot or two.

And ALSO, he's lactose intolerant and literally nobody on earth cares. It's enough to make even Santa Claus hit a breaking point.

Christmas is fun. Send fun cards.


Paper: Canadian-sourced, high-quality uncoated white linen matte 100 lb card stock. It's smooth with just a little texture and professional as all heck. Everything is sourced from some buds I made on the internet at Pacific Paper Co. in Vancouver.

Size: Standard A2: 4.25 inches x 5.5 inches. 

Envelopes: Brown kraft paper, like the colour of a paper bag you might carry a bottle of booze around in. Also sourced from Pacific Paper Co

Details: Every greeting card from Greeting Cards for Assholes is handmade in Canada with irreverence, a wildly unacceptable sense of humour, and an attitude that could definitely be improved. I print and fold every single card all by myself.

Oh, and all of our cards are empty on the inside, just like us.

Stock up on all our funny, made in Canada greeting cards, and send more mail! It's fun! 

(Reminder: shipping is free anywhere in the world when you spend $10 or more!)

Have a terrific day!