The This Just In, Go Fuck Yourself Card
This seems to be a polite way to tell people to go fuck themselves. It's kinda like buddy on this card is a news anchor, all dressed fancy-like and everything. And you can tell people are gonna listen. When this guy does the "just wait a minute" thing, you'd best pay attention.
The time is now to stock up on these bad boys and send them out willy nilly to everyone who needs one - which is, to be fair, most people you know.
ABOUT OUR PRINTED GREETING CARDS
Obviously this doesn't apply to e-cards which are high quality JPEG images with a resolution of 2000 x 2000 pixels, and you'll get an email immediately with an instant download link.
But if you're buying printed cards, here are the details:
Paper: High-quality, heavyweight 100 lb card stock that's Forest Stewardship Council® (FSC®) certified, with a super smooth, professional finish.
Size: Standard A2: 4.25 inches x 5.5 inches.
Envelopes: Brown kraft paper, like the colour of a paper bag you might carry a bottle of booze around in. You don't have to lick anything as they're peel & stick, and they have a super strong adhesive so you don't need to worry about the journey you're sending them on.
Details: Every greeting card from Greeting Cards for Assholes is handmade in Canada with irreverence, a wildly unacceptable sense of humour, and an attitude that could definitely be improved. I design, print, and fold every single card all by myself. Yes, actually.
Oh, and all of the cards are empty on the inside, just like me. And maybe you.
Stock up on all our funny, made in Canada greeting cards, and send more mail! It's fun!
Have a terrific day!
-Adam